Plot Bunnies Fornicating in my Brain
by EJR HorseLady
Summary: Random oneshots that just begged to be written. Ratings vary between K to M. Prompts are welcome. Chapter 08: After Meliodas' death at the hands of the Ten Commandments, Elizabeth must now imagine a life without him.
1. Tears and Frustrations

None of the stories in Plot Bunnies are beta read, so don't expect much in the way of quality

Disclaimer: Seven Deadly Sins also known as Nanatsu no Taizai is not mine and I make no profit off this.

Summary: Baby Elizabeth is sick and nothing will calm her down… except her favourite person.

Characters: Elizabeth, Caroline, Meliodas, Veronica

* * *

 **Tears and Frustrations**

Many young girls dream of being a princess or queen, thinking only of the wealth, pretty dresses and jewelry available to them. Believing that as royalty they could do whatever they want and order about the servants on whatever whim that they happen to have at the time.

What they don't realize is that being a queen is a full time job where one is forced to make difficult decisions knowing full well that no matter what you decide someone is going to either oppose you or suffer from your choice or both. It's a position that requires a great deal of sacrifice and dedication with little in the way of thanks.

Many young girls dream of being a mother, thinking only of the joy of holding one's own creation in their arms filled with smiles and warm coos. Imagining teaching their child how to walk and talk, of kisses on cheeks and time spent together.

Then reality sets in with the arrival of a younger sibling or said child. Nights became filled with screams and wails, sleep is a rare luxury, and one comes to the unpleasant realization that cloth diapers don't work very well for very long. To say nothing about the pain of giving birth to the child in the first place.

Being queen did offer a few perks when it came to being a mother, however. Nannies could look after a child while the mother was busy with other matters and wet nurses could be hired easily to feed a hungry infant. In truth, beyond giving birth a queen could just hand their child over to others and be done with the matter until the child was old enough to carry on conversation, and some did just that.

Caroline was not one of those queens. When she married Bartra, who was still a prince at the time, she had made her stance on motherhood very clear. Caroline was going to feed her children and not some wet nurse, unless there was some medical reason why she couldn't. Nannies, while sadly necessary to the busy queen, would not be used often since Caroline wanted to be involved in her children's lives.

It worked out well for both Margaret and Veronica, it took a bit of fumbling in the beginning with Margaret and her nanny, but eventually everything settled and when Veronica came along. Caroline mostly knew what to expect and when she needed to hand her child off to perform her queenly duties. Elizabeth was a bit different however.

Because Caroline didn't give birth to Elizabeth her body had no milk to offer, and because of that a wet nurse became necessary. Because of being forced to give up a vast portion of interacting with her youngest daughter Caroline was even more determined to be in her daughter's life as often as she could. Right now as her ears were being deafened with piercing screams, and sobbing hiccups, Caroline was both simultaneously grateful and questioning the logic of her decision.

The whole of Liones had come down with some sort of illness that caused high fevers, upset stomachs and ache that could be felt throughout the whole body. It didn't last very long fortunately, only about three days, but it was still enough that so far nine elderly and twelve children had died from this outbreak. Caroline held her daughter closer at the thought, wishing that her husband were here with them and not out with Zaratras in Camelot negotiating treaties.

Veronica had been the first in the family to get sick, followed shortly after by Denzel, and Margaret. It wasn't until Veronica was completely better and Denzel and Margaret were on the mend did Caroline herself fall victim to the illness. Exhausted from caring for her children with little rest for days on end, Caroline was exhausted and the illness had hit her hard only for her to find that Elizabeth too was sick. By that time the death toll for children from this illness had risen once again and Caroline was determined to spend every moment with her youngest daughter in fear that it might be her last.

Bouncing her wailing infant in her arms as she paced the length of the bedroom Caroline turned her head to the side and let out a full bodied cough. The action startled the already upset child and Elizabeth's cries took on a more angry tone before stopping to let out a few coughs herself.

"Poor baby." Caroline soothed her child as best she could with her voice hoarse from a swollen throat. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to startle you." Elizabeth ignored her mother's efforts to soothe her and just went back into another round of painful crying.

Sighing in defeat Caroline just started walking and bouncing again trying to ignore the heat that plagued her body and desire to crawl into the tempting bed. She wished she could do something to ease Elizabeth's pain but nothing seemed to work. The lukewarm baths that Veronica and Margaret found soothing only aggravated Elizabeth, and the warm soups that helped ease the scratchiness of the throat wouldn't work on a four month old baby who drank only milk. There was only one other option that Caroline could think of that might help, one that had never failed thus far. Sadly that option had been unavailable for the last month, though hopefully he would return to Liones soon.

A knock on the door startled Caroline out of a tired daze that she was unaware she had fallen into and made her pause in her monotonous actions. "What is it?" She called out as best she could with a sore throat to the guard who had knocked.

"We just received word that Sir Meliodas has returned, Your Majesty. Should I send him in once he arrives?" The guard asked, voice muffled through the door.

"Yes, please. Have him come as soon as possible." Caroline answered, very nearly slumping in relief. Hearing an affirmative noise on the other side of the door Caroline turned her attention back to the crying child she carried. "Hear that, baby? Your man's coming to see you. You missed him didn't you?" Elizabeth just kept crying.

It wasn't long before there was another knock on the door, but this time it swung open before Caroline could answer. Meliodas entered the room and quickly made his way over to the wailing infant holding out his arms in anticipation. "Hey there little one, I missed you. What's with all the crying, huh? I could hear you half way across the castle."

As much as she loved her daughter Caroline was more than ready to hand her over. Elizabeth, realizing that her favourite person had arrived, threw her weight in Meliodas' direction wanting to be held by him instead of her mother, leaving Caroline to hold her daughter awkwardly for a few seconds before Meliodas managed to get a hold.

"There, there. I know you're not feeling well and that it hurts, but you'll be alright." Meliodas cooed to Elizabeth who was quickly settling down. "There we go, that's better."

Caroline, who could no longer resist temptation's call and sat on the edge of the bed, watched in silence as her sick and crying daughter calmed and settled into Meliodas' arms.

Silence. Pure, blessed silence.

Green eyes glanced in the queen's direction and quickly gave her an appraising look, taking in the tired slump of her body and glazed look in her eyes. There were several other signs but all of them pointed to one thing. "You look tired, Caroline."

"So do you." Caroline fired back only realizing the truth of that statement after she said it. Meliodas did indeed look tired and more than a little scuffed up. There were rips and tears in his long white jacket that weren't there before and his eyes spoke of long days with little sleep.

A small tired smile crossed Meliodas' face at her words. "Not nearly as tired as you." He said while tapping gentle pats up Elizabeth's back and shifting his weight from one foot to the other in a gentle rocking motion. "Go crawl into bed, Caroline. I got her."

With the sirens' call of sleep beckoning, Meliodas' reassurances and Elizabeth's relative contentment, Caroline could only agree. As she went to the dresser to get a nightgown to change into, a loud belch that would make a grown man proud filled the air. Whirling to face the other two people in the room Caroline was treated to the sight of Meliodas staring at Elizabeth in stunned disbelief.

"That was the most impressive burp I will ever hear in my life," Meliodas deadpanned. Caroline exploded into giggles having already experienced a similar event with Veronica, although Elizabeth's was far more impressive.

Grabbing her nightgown and heading behind the changing screen Caroline could hear Meliodas resume his murmurings to Elizabeth as he paced back and forth within the large bedroom. There was a pause in the murmurings as Meliodas let out a brief noise of surprise.

"Caroline," Meliodas called with rueful amusement colouring his tone. "When you're finished would you mind holding her for a bit?"

"She throw up on you?" Caroline asked pulling the nightgown over head.

"No, but I'm changing her diaper and nightgown. How'd it get all the way up your back?" Meliodas wondered aloud. Caroline couldn't help but huff out a laugh at the question that was clearly directed towards Elizabeth.

Coming from behind the change curtain Caroline observed the scene taking place before her and couldn't help but think that Meliodas would make an excellent father; he changed diapers. Even as far back as Margaret, Bartra never changed any diapers and always passed the job off to one of the servants whenever the task came up. Once Elizabeth was as clean as she was going to get outside of a proper bath Meliodas handed the naked infant over to her mother while he hurried out the door to grab another diaper and nightgown from the nursery.

Caroline watched in amusement as Elizabeth slowly came to the realization that her favourite person was no longer the one holding her and scrunched her face up in displeasure. Just as the first sounds of a cry started up Meliodas walked back through the door, and instantly Elizabeth's face smoothed out and the crying stopped. Caroline was almost jealous at such blatant favouritism.

Caroline watched in silence as Meliodas finished his self appointed task before picking Elizabeth up again and walking with her, telling her of some story or another. With the soothing sound of Meliodas' voice filling the air Caroline could feel herself slipping into a doze again as her vision became hazy. This time it was the feel of a hand on her arm that brought Caroline back to reality.

"Bed, Caroline." Meliodas ordered softly, gently pushing her in the direction of the bed.

Giving a hum of acknowledgement Caroline crawled under the covers and settled. The way that the room was covered in a soft glow from the fire in the hearth and the sound of Meliodas' soft footsteps blended with the sound of his voice was so very soothing, Caroline had no problem falling deep asleep.

Sleeping the sleep of only the truly exhausted Caroline completely missed when Meliodas surrendered to his own exhaustion and kicked off his boots so he could lay atop of the bed with Elizabeth sleeping on his chest. She also missed when, hours later, Elizabeth woke up and started to fuss signaling her hunger. She never once stirred when Meliodas got up and asked the guards at the door to send for the wet nurse, or when the nurse arrived to feed Elizabeth. When the wet nurse left and Meliodas once again lay atop the bed with Elizabeth on his chest the only motion Caroline made was to turn over onto her side facing away from the two. Not once did she wake.

The sun was bright as Veronica ran down the hall with the energy and enthusiasm only a child could have. It was late morning and since her mother didn't come down for breakfast, Veronica decided she would go up to her. So with that simple logic in mind Veronica made her way to her parents' room.

The guards at the door saw the incoming princess and, to their credit, tried to avert the damage that would be inadvertently caused by the young princess. "Princess Veronica, your mother and Princess Elizabeth are ill. They're currently resting so please, let them sleep."

"No! Open door!" Veronica demanded with a deep scowl on her face at being denied what she wanted.

The other guard tried his luck. "Princess, please try to understand-"

"NO!" Veronica interrupted with a stomp of her foot. "Want my Mommy!"

The two guards looked at each other knowing full well of the tantrum that would soon erupt from the young princess. "Alright princess, we'll let you in but please let them sleep."

Scowl suddenly gone from her face, Veronica instead gave a lovely smile. "Ok." She chirped happily.

Opening the door one of the guards had the presence of mind to follow after the princess to observe the scene so that there would be no misunderstandings later.

On the bed the queen slept under the covers, on her side facing away from the other two sleeping on the bed. On the other side of the bed, a respectable distance away and on top of the covers, was Meliodas who was sleeping sitting up against the headboard and pillows with Princess Elizabeth sleeping splayed out on his chest with his left arm supporting her. All three figures on the bed were fully clothed so the scene was innocent and chaste and the guard did not doubt the pureness of the situation.

All this was lost to Veronica.

With the loudest, highest pitched scream she could achieve, Veronica lept forward to latch on to Meliodas' right arm to try and pull him away from her mother and off the bed. "No, no, no, no, NO!"

Everyone woke with a jolt.

"Wha?" Caroline managed to get out, sitting up to look over at the commotion. While Elizabeth, who was surprised by the sudden noise, started to cry. Meliodas just looked blankly at the two year old tugging on his right arm.

"Off, off, off! Daddy sleeps there! Daddy sleeps with Mommy! Off, off, off!" Veronica screamed as loud as she could while yanking on the captured arm with all her strength.

Caroline fell back onto the bed with a moan.

Turning to face the queen Meliodas could see that she had thrown one arm over her eyes and was muttering under her breath. The words "I love my kids, I love my kids, I love my kids…" could barely be heard over the cries of one child that he held to his chest with one arm and the screams of "NO" from another child pulling on his other arm while stomping her feet.

Needless to say, even though the day had only just begun, both Meliodas and Caroline wanted it to end.

* * *

End


	2. Friends

Takes place after chapter 196

Summary: Meliodas takes a moment to appreciate a very dear friend.

Characters: Meliodas, Hawk Momma

* * *

 **Friends**

It was early morning, the light of dawn was beginning to wake the first birds from their slumber to begin their morning song. The grass was still wet from the rain that fell during the night and puddles dotted the ground in every low spot while tree leaves and spider webs hung on to the water droplets creating an eye catching display.

Meliodas' shoes made a soft squish whenever he stepped on a particularly damp section of grass as he walked in the direction of the one he was looking for. He spotted her just as he broke the tree line, she was laying on the ground and rolling happily in the patch of mud she had found. Hawk Momma noticed his approach and sat up, letting out a quick grunt of hello to welcome Meliodas and to show that she was happy to see him.

"Hey." He called back in greeting, observing that Hawk Momma had found a particularly deep mud puddle to wallow in. "I guess you're enjoying the mud huh?"

She was indeed! It was rare for her to be able to find a patch of mud both large enough and deep enough to enjoy comfortably, but she had found this one and intended on staying for a bit; so if he wanted to visit could he please be so kind as to come to her? She was really rather comfortable and didn't particularly want to move.

Meliodas stopped for a moment at the edge of the mud puddle to remove his shoes and toss them to drier, firmer ground, then proceeded to walk right up to Hawk Momma paying no mind to the cold, wet muck that was now clinging to his feet and shins. He scratched and rubbed at her snout a bit before abandoning all pretense and just threw his whole body against her side in a semblance of a hug while tears started flowing down his cheeks.

"I am _so_ sorry." He sobbed out uncontrollably, fully aware that his words would never portray just how sorry he was.

Hawk Momma let out a low moan, trying to tell him that it wasn't his fault and that he couldn't have known that she would be attacked. Even if they had known, she would still have gone willingly into that battle; she just would have done a few things differently was all.

"Thank you." Meliodas whispered in sincere gratitude, wiping his tears away as he pulled back a bit to look into Hawk Momma's eyes.

Hawk Momma decided to take the opportunity to try and cheer her dear friend up a bit, so without any warning she gave him a full bodied lick. Her efforts were rewarded with a surprised 'hey!' and Meliodas darting quickly out of range of her tongue; but there was a smile playing about on his face and warmth had returned to his eyes so Hawk Momma considered that a win.

Meliodas couldn't help but chuckle at the smug and satisfied look on her face. The world may be falling apart around him, and his mind may be in turmoil from his recent resurrection, but he had the most wonderful friends to help and support him.

* * *

Because Hawk Momma needs some love.


	3. Toiletries

I had a _shit_ ton of fun writing this one. ;P

Summary: Elizabeth develops a love/hate relationship with the nature of things, and learns about the differing lifestyles between princess and commoner.

Characters: Elizabeth, Meliodas

* * *

 **Toiletries**

Elizabeth had known that the moment that she had left the castle that she would need to leave behind her princess ways of doing things; and she had succeeded rather well. However there were some things that still managed to catch her completely off guard. One of those things happened shortly after she had escaped the castle.

Walking around in a hot and heavy rusted suit of armour was bad enough, couple that with a certain bodily function that was making itself increasingly known made everything that much worse. Elizabeth darted into the thick forest and struggled out of the armour before realizing that her outfit, while great for moving around in, meant that she would have to take it off completely if she wanted to use the bushes. Hesitating for only a moment before nature's call beckoned once again, Elizabeth quickly undid the clasp behind her neck and pulled off the bodysuit. Clad in only her stockings and arm wraps Elizabeth crouched and relieved herself.

The second problem made itself known right after she finished; she had to wipe herself.

Back at the castle whenever she or one of her family had to use the chamberpot there had always been a servant there to help remove clothes; pants in the case of her father and Veronica, or move skirts out of the way in the case of Margaret and herself, wipe their bottoms or privates when the deed was done, and then move their pants or skirts back into position again before removing the chamberpot to discard the contents inside. In truth it was near impossible to reach one's nether regions with big poofy skirts anyway.

Letting loose some words that would have made her father blush at her crassness, and tavern men laugh at their mild nature, Elizabeth grabbed hold of some of the nearby bush leaves and, making sure her hand was as covered as it could be with the leaves and the arm coverings, wiped herself for the first time. Clad once again in cloth and armour, Elizabeth let out a sigh of relief and smiled, congratulating herself for doing something she had never done before and was actually quite easy to do.

Three days later she would be cursing some more when she developed a red and itchy rash from some plant she didn't know the name of, but swore to never use again. From that point on Elizabeth took gleeful joy in trampling every bush of the evil plant she came across under her armour clad feet. (Meliodas would later teach her about Stinging Nettles and how to cure the itch by making a paste out of Dock leaves, but she still hated the plant and delighted in finding various ways of destroying them, much to Meliodas' entertainment and King's dismay.)

By the time she started sharing a bed with Meliodas in the Boar Hat, she had become so jaded to this particular act of nature that she didn't even care that he was there when she fished the chamberpot out from under their shared bed in the middle of the night and relieved herself right there. Elizabeth also tastefully ignored the rare nights when it was Meliodas who woke up and freed himself from the rope to use the chamberpot.

~.~.~

Bathing in the Boar Hat was a unique challenge. First one had to get water, then heat it up on the stove, and finally haul it upstairs to the bathing room to pour it into the wooden tub. Getting the water was easy since Meliodas kept several barrels of it in the Boar Hat at any time, and the stove was large enough to heat two pots of water at the same time. The only part that Elizabeth might have had trouble with would be getting the pot of boiled water up the stairs, fortunately she had a strong and kind man to help her with that, even if he did crack jokes about bathing together the whole time.

Getting rid of the dirty water was a puzzle that Elizabeth never did fully figure out. The usual method of just dumping the tub on it's side was out, because doing that would've just flooded the downstairs bar, and there were no openings in the the wall so simply tossing the water outside with a bucket wouldn't work. Plus poor Hawk Momma probably wouldn't be too happy about the unexpected bath either. Elizabeth supposed that it was possible to get rid of the water in the same way the tub was filled; one bucket full at a time, down the stairs and out into the surrounding woods to dump it, but it seemed like an awful amount of work.

The answer turned out to be surprisingly simple; magic. She didn't know what spell Meliodas used, and the one time she asked he had simply given her a hard look and said: "Forbidden magic. Please drop the subject and don't ask again."

Dropping the subject like he asked, Elizabeth simply accepted that the dirty water was removed by magic; that made the whole of the Boar Hat reek like rotting meat when used.

Because of the combined hassle of making and getting rid of bath water, Elizabeth didn't often bathe there. Instead she bathed outside in rivers and lakes with Diane… and occasionally Meliodas, whenever he decided to join in.

~.~.~

After the failed shopping attempt that resulted in Elizabeth and Hawk buying a brush and a plate, Meliodas was understandably reluctant to let the two of them buy any necessities for Elizabeth on their own. So with the coin purse firmly in Meliodas' hands the two had gone to town to go shopping while Hawk stayed behind to watch the tavern.

Elizabeth could admit that it was a little embarrassing when he followed her into the women's clothing store. There was one dress that she loved and drifted towards, but after he gave a pointed look at the price tag of the dress, Elizabeth realized that she'd managed to find the most expensive dress in the whole store and Meliodas wasn't about to pay that sort of money for one article of clothing when she needed an assortment of clothes that would last her for who knows how long. She ended up leaving the store with one light summer dress, one warmer dress for cooler weather, five pairs of panties, two sets of stockings, a shawl, and two pairs of shoes. Elizabeth was more than a little chagrined when she realized that they bought all this and still had money left over, while the one dress she wanted would have cost more than what they had brought all together.

After leaving the clothing store the pair traveled a little ways down the street when Meliodas suddenly stopped and offered her the change purse. Puzzled Elizabeth had looked at the money bag briefly before turning a questioning gaze on Meliodas.

"It's for in there." Meliodas offered in the way of explanation, nodding at the store that they had just stopped in front of.

Not understanding the situation, Elizabeth cautiously took the proffered bag of money while asking if that meant she could buy whatever she wanted in there.

"Well, if you feel like you don't need anything for your woman's monthly... sure." Meliodas replied while cocking his head to the side.

Elizabeth squeaked and flushed a brilliant crimson before she darted into the store, keeping her head down the whole time. Fortunately the woman who ran the shop was very patient and understanding of Elizabeth's situation, and she explained everything that Elizabeth needed to know about the special rags that women used and how to fasten the leather harness that kept everything together. Elizabeth also learned about a herbal concoction that prevented unwanted pregnancy, and when Elizabeth declined the woman got a grin on her face and offered instead another concoction that helped women to get pregnant. Elizabeth was quick to decline that too. With her face in a constant flush, Elizabeth left the store with just the materials she went in to get.

It wasn't until they were well on their way back to the Boar Hat when it occurred to Elizabeth that she should thank Meliodas for what he'd done. As embarrassing as the situation was, if it hadn't been for his foresight, Elizabeth would have a a big and bloody problem in the upcoming days. Much to her surprise however, Meliodas simply shrugged the situation off.

"Just a rule of female knights. Best to have the supplies and not need them, then to need them and not have them."

Well that made sense, especially since the Sins had two females in the group.

~.~.~

Being back in the castle and surrounded by servants was an odd feeling. The tasks that she'd gotten so used to doing on her own (such as dressing herself) were now done by two or more servants and the clothing was tight and difficult to move in. A far cry to the looser top and skirt that she had grown so comfortable with.

After thinking about it long and hard one evening, Elizabeth came to the conclusion that she liked the simple life, and yearned to be able to do things on her own once again. She had been given a taste of freedom, a taste of life outside the castle, and she wanted more. So with the knowledge that Meliodas was leaving, Elizabeth didn't hesitate to sneak a maid's dress out of a storage trunk (and put it on all by herself) before running out to the Boar Hat, prepared to go on another adventure.

Elizabeth even remembered to stock up on her monthly products. Sadly she forgot to bring them with her, and they remained behind in a basket on her bed, right alongside with the plant poison she'd bought.

* * *

Because HISTORY! Toilets and showers were not invented yet. Also bathrooms were for bathing, not for relieving oneself (that really was done in the bedroom).

The position of the royal bum wiper was called "Groom of the Stool". It was a position that many people wanted since it often led to big promotions like "Private Secretary".

Show of hands fellow North Americans; who has gotten poison ivy or poison oak in inconvenient places? (Raises hand)

What about you people in the UK? Who's had the misfortune to run into stinging nettles? (Never been there, so not me. ^_^)

* * *

End


	4. Summer Frustrations

Summary: Liz tries to get comfortable in the crazy heat of summer while cursing Meliodas' nonchalant attitude.

Characters: Meliodas, Liz

AN: Happy (belated) birthday Meliodas

* * *

Liz lay on the floor spread eagle. The summer had reached an all time hot and she was not enjoying it in the least. The worst part was that it isn't a dry heat, oh no, _that_ at least would have been tolerable. This was the sticky, humid, feeling more like you're swimming than walking heat.

She hated it.

There were things she could be doing, there were things she _should_ be doing, but getting up the energy to move was just not happening. So instead she lay on the cool stone floor of their home, spread out, clad only in a pair of panties and her chest bindings.

The fact that Meliodas was ignoring her nearly nude body to work on paperwork didn't bother her in the least. Infact she was glad for it. It was too hot to do anything anyway.

"How are you able to focus on paperwork in this heat?"

…

Why did she just ask that? Drawing Meliodas' attention to her will no doubt get him started with his perversions.

"Pardon?" Meliodas asked, turning his attention away from the oh-so-important documents that sat on the desk. This was the first time he acknowledged her presence since he'd come home carrying those papers, eyes running a quick sweep over her nearly nude form. He didn't say or do anything then and, aside from running his eyes over her again, didn't say or do anything now.

"I said: how are you able to focus on paperwork in this heat?" Liz repeated slowly, as if talking to a child.

Meliodas just shrugged in answer, turning back to his papers. "It needs to get done."

Liz gave a hum of acknowledgement and settled back into the floor, only to shift uncomfortably since the stones had warmed with her body heat. Scooting to a new spot, Liz once again eyed her lover sitting calmly in the chair at the desk. Aside from his hand to write something, he hadn't moved at her shuffling.

"Aren't you hot in those clothes?"

Meliodas didn't even bother to look at her as he answered. "Not really."

Letting out another hum Liz shifted again. The stone was heating up too fast and it wasn't very comfortable to lay on.

"If you're hot then you should take off your wrap and panties, getting some air in those spots will help cool you down."

Ah ha! _There_ it was. Liz was beginning to wonder. "You pervert, you just want me to get naked for you."

This time it was Meliodas who shifted to look at his lover, shooting her a dry look. "Liz do you _want_ to have sex right now?"

"No!"

"All right then," Meliodas said as he nodded in acceptance. Without another word he turned back to his papers and dipped the quill in the inkwell to make a note.

Liz sat frozen in disbelief at what had just happened. A wave of frustration flowed through her at Meliodas' disregard, and without hesitation she stripped her panties off before sitting up to unwind her breast bind. Wadding the cloth up into a ball, she scooted into position so that Meliodas could have the best possible view of what he wouldn't be getting for the foreseeable future, and took aim.

She watched in smug amusement as Meliodas' hand shot out instinctively to catch the airborne ball of cloth. Peering down at the bundle in his hand, his eyes quickly shot to Liz and took in the view of her laying naked on the floor, before smiling his naughty grin.

Quickly unfolding the bundle, Meliodas put the panties on his head like a hat and wrapped the breast bind around his neck like a scarf. "Thanks for the presents."

Liz watched, mouth agape, as Meliodas once again returned to his paperwork and ignored her presence.

" _ **ASSHOLE!**_ "

* * *

End


	5. The Prey (Bardic Lore)

Summary: Merlin is being pursued by a tenacious hunter, so she seeks aid from the one man she knows can help her.

Characters: Merlin, Meliodas

AN: This takes place about 100 or so years after the Holy War. I also decided to turn this into a mini series. So here's part 1 of the Bardic Lore series. Also…

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TRINITY (I turned you into a horse ;P ).

* * *

Merlin sat on the back of her horse and sighed, irritated at the sight of the dust cloud in the distance. She knew exactlywhat was causing it. Or _who_ , as the case may be. With one final derisive glare at the rising column of dust, she urged Trinity into a gallop, away from the approaching cloud. She hadn't wanted to push her horse too hard since she liked this particular one, but now she was left with little choice.

The ground and landscape passed by in a blur of colour and the hooves of her horse made a rhythmic sound that echoed in her ears, alongside the hiss of wind. Her mare wasn't the fastest horse, but she did have a lot of heart. Merlin could respect that.

Pressing herself as flat as she could over her horse's back and neck, Merlin made a silent vow to one day learn a flying spell, or teleporting spell, or _something_ that would make it more difficult for people to pursue her. Anything would be better than running her favourite horse into the ground.

The sun was hanging low in the sky by the time Merlin slowed her horse. A loud cough and a stumble made Merlin wince. Trinity was not doing well. She was covered in white lather and was breathing harshly, moving forward one laborious step at a time. Sliding off her back Merlin grabbed the reins and continued forward on foot, her poor, tired mount following obediently behind. Fortunately they weren't far from their destination.

Reaching the crest of a hill, Merlin looked down at the town nestled in the valley below. It was a tiny little town, with only thirteen or so buildings with the largest being the stables. Since the town was built on a major trade route it was bustling with people who were constantly coming and going, so it made sense that the second largest building was the tavern, which doubled as the inn.

A rough push from behind startled Merlin out of her thoughts. Trinity had apparently had enough of standing around, and was more than ready to continue on.

A stable boy was waiting for her as she approached the town. He must have seen her descend the hill on foot and was waiting to provide as much care to her horse as possible. Merlin silently approved, it meant that whoever ran the stable _cared_ about the animals in his temporary care. It also meant that they could charge more money _because_ they provided exemplary care for the beasts. Not that it mattered to Merlin. She had enough money, and even if she didn't she could have traded her services as a mage in exchange.

Sometimes it paid to be powerful.

"Winded, but in good spirits." The stable boy surmised as he eyed her mare with a trained eye. "Doubt she'll need more then a walk down an' a good feed. Unless there's something else?"

Merlin was doubly impressed now. For one so young to know so much from a glace… and the way he left an open ended question like that showed that he know some people pampered their beasts, or that there may be a hidden health problem that wasn't readily apparent. Quality service indeed.

"No you're right. Trinity likes to run, but I pushed her today." She answered, tossing a small bag of coin in the boy's direction. She watched as the boy opened the bag and emptied it into his palm, brow raising upon realizing the amount of money being offered. "Treat her well. I like this horse." Merlin answered in response to his unasked question.

"Of course M'lady. She'll be properly cared for." The boy said, grabbing the reins and urging the mare forward. Only to let out a yelp as he ended up nearly getting bowled over by Trinity, who was eager to get to the barn and food.

Knowing that Trinity was in good hands Merlin turned her attention to the tavern. It was there, Merlin knew, that she would find him. The one person that could make her pursuer give up his chase. The one person that she trusted and loved above all others.

Upon entering the tavern, the first thing that Merlin noticed was that it reeked. The presence of so many unwashed bodies covered in travelers dust, created an unpleasant smell that nearly drowned out the smell of alcohol. The smell just made Merlin aware that she too was covered in road dust and sweat. Other than the smell, the tavern was bright and cheery, and Merlin found herself approving of the layout and decorations.

The bartender was a grizzled old man who gave her a quick once over as she approached. "I'm looking for a man named Meliodas."

"I dunno who 'e is lass, but if yer lookin' fer a man t' spend th' night with, I gots room in me bed," he said with a smile. "Dur's som'thin to be said 'bout _experience_."

 _There's also something to be said about brushing your teeth_. Merlin thought as she fought the urge to shudder in revulsion as the man's smile and leer only highlighted how rotten and decayed the inside of his mouth was. "You're correct of course, but it's Meliodas' experience that I want. Short, blonde hair, green eyes. Where is he?"

"Da boy? You wants da _boy_?!" Merlin didn't say anything and kept her face impassive as the bartender went on a rant about how women liked them younger and younger these days. She had a sudden suspicion that the women of this town had fallen for Meliodas' charms, and several had no doubt tried to proposition him.

"He's on the second floor, in the last room, down the hall and to the right," came a voice from Merlin's left. The speaker turned out to be a young woman who, if Merlin were to hazard a guess, was a prostitute that had tried, and failed, to get him in bed. "I warn you though, he's turned away every woman who's tried to entertain him."

Suspicions confirmed, Merlin simply thanked the woman and headed for the stairs. It was easy to tell what door belonged to Meliodas based on the number of women standing around staring at it. Ignoring the tittering gaggle of females, Merlin strode right up to the door and knocked firmly.

"What do you want **now**?"

Merlin's eyebrows shot up at the unexpected tone. These girls must have really been bothering him if he was talking like that. Undeterred she answered in a way to indicate who she was and what she wanted, but with words that would make the girls go away defeated. "Your experience."

Silence.

There door opened and green eyes laughed at her behind blonde hair. "Well, you're the one woman I would never say no to."

"Can I have that in writing?" Merlin asked, knowing what the answer would be.

A cheeky grin. "No."

Meliodas stood to the side and Merlin made her way into the room. Once the door was shut again the various sounds of feminine dismay could be heard, wafting through the door.

A quick glance around the room showed it to be just like every other room of a standard inn. Small, with a bed, desk and wash basin. Not at all concerned with modesty, Merlin went straight for the wash basin, shedding her sweat and dust stained clothes in the process.

The silence in the room was comfortable as Merlin finished cleaning up as best she could outside of a proper bath. They had known each other long enough that words weren't often necessary. The way Meliodas sat on the bed, coupled with the way his fingers twitched, as if wanting to clench into fists, showed just how annoyed he was by the girls. And the way his eyes tracked every little movement she made showed that he knew that she was upset in general, although he didn't know what caused it yet.

Meliodas was sitting on the bed, holding out a clean tunic for her to put on. He may be short, but his shoulders were broad, and the tunic fit Merlin well enough. Even if it did only _just_ cover her crotch. Sitting next to him Merlin took a deep breath and began her tale. She wasn't even halfway through before she discovered a complication.

"Meliodas, stop laughing. It isn't funny," she hissed, not at all amused by his laughter.

"Yes, yes it is."

Throwing her hands in the air, Merlin stood and started to pace back and forth, voice beginning to rise in her agitation. "Meliodas, I'm asking for your help and all you're doing is laughing at me."

At seeing how upset he was making Merlin with his actions, Meliodas got himself under control and wiped away the reflexive tears. "Ok, so let me get this straight. You helped a bard out, then said bard decided that you were the woman of his dreams and he fell in love with you. Now this guy is following you around and is writing and singing love songs to you every chance he gets?"

"Yes," she hissed, pulling furiously at her hair. Her wide eyes, clenched jaw and mussed hair made for a frazzled look, while her hands moved from her hair to her sides where they clenched and unclenched, while she took deep and loud breaths. The rising magic emanating from her only enhanced the moment, causing little dust particles to skirt along the floor and a breeze to flow within their closed room. All in all she looked the very picture of a stressed out woman about to melt down

Meliodas tried desperately to smother another round of laughter at the sight of Merlin working herself up over an infatuated fool. "Merlin," Meliodas started, holding one arm out invitingly. "Come here. I'll protect you from the big bad bard, and his evil lute."

Merlin let out a frustrated sigh, but complied. Her magic dying suddenly at the release of her anger. "You'll see," she muttered as she took the rare opportunity to snuggle. Hugs from Meliodas had always been rare, but she treasured every one of them. Burying her face into Meliodas' chest, she listened to the sound of his many heartbeats thumping in her ears. It was her favourite sound as a little girl and it calmed and soothed her agitated nerves now. "He'll come, and then you'll see."

Meliodas let out a hum as he adjusted them so they could both lay comfortably on the bed, one hand rubbing her back soothingly while another carded through her hair. "Let him come. He'll very quickly realize that my heart-daughter has an overprotective father."

Warmth built in Merlin's chest at hearing those words. It wasn't often that they admitted their adoptive roles, but she loved it when they did. It always made her feel happy, knowing that the love she felt for him was reciprocated. Closing her eyes and settling, Merlin knew, beyond any doubt, that there would be no man that she would ever love as much as she loved her heart-father.

* * *

To be continued...


	6. Stupid, Foolish Boy

Summary: A look at Elaine's death and what came after.

Characters: Elaine, Ban (mentioned)

Author's Note: This is my entry for Banlane week on Tumblr (I'm only doing one, not the whole week). It's also my comeback fic from a very long break. I hope everyone enjoys.

Thanks to Lickitysplit for being an awesome beta.

* * *

 **Stupid, Foolish Boy**

Death is yellow and green.

It wasn't the most eloquent of thoughts, but it was the first thing Elaine could think of after opening her eyes.

It was a strange feeling, being dead. The best she could describe it was being alive, but numb. Like her whole body had fallen asleep but without the pins and needles feeling. Truly odd, but still a blessing considering the amount of pain she'd been in only moments before.

Elaine floated into the air, determined to get a good look around and see where she was, and if there was anything to note nearby. It was somewhat depressing to see nothing but a pale yellow sky that stretched out in every direction. There was no wind, no clouds, no variation in colour, nothing but endless yellow broken only by the tall green crystal pillars of various size and shape.

"So now what?" Elaine asked the empty air around her. "Is this it? Am I truly to be alone for the rest of eternity?"

Silence was her answer.

~.~.~

You could see the living through the crystals.

For so long all Elaine had wanted was to be free of the fountain, to have her brother back and her friends to talk to. Then Ban had come. He had come with amazing tales of life outside of the forest, of people and places and all the different types of ale those people and places made. Suddenly Elaine's goal shifted; all she wanted was to see those places with Ban. Now, even though it wasn't the way she imagined travelling with him, Elaine could see what the world outside the forest had to offer right alongside Ban.

Words could not begin to describe how touched she was at the care and consideration and the amount of thought that Ban put into the location of where he would plant the seed. Elaine could honestly admit that she was as surprised as he was when the tree sprang to life at the blood Ban offered to help it grow.

For the first time since she had died Elaine was happy.

"I'm here Ban," she whispered soothingly to the man she'd come to love so dearly. "I'm here and I'm going to see the world with you. Just like you promised. So do lots of traveling ok?"

Ban simply tossed in his sleep, lost in a nightmare.

~.~.~

Humans were judgemental.

It didn't take long before knights of some human kingdom or another caught up to Ban. He could have escaped or fought back or done _something_ , but instead Ban allowed himself to be captured. Not sure as to his reasons why, Elaine just watched and wondered.

It didn't take long before dread settled into into the pit of her stomach at the realization of what was happening. Ban had deliberately allowed himself to be caught believing that he should suffer for what had happened in the forest.

"It wasn't him!" Elaine declared, slapping her hands uselessly against the wall of green she was watching from. "It wasn't him, and who are you to say you're allies with the fairy king? Who are you to judge what happened? You never showed any interest in the forest before except to try and conquer it, so why do you care now that it's gone?"

Ban was sentenced as guilty and Elaine collapsed to the ground crying.

~.~.~

Humans had many different ways of killing each other.

Elaine had thought she'd known about human cruelty. She thought she'd witnessed it in the seven hundred years that she'd been alone, protecting the forest.

She didn't know anything.

Ban was stabbed through the heart, then his head was chopped off, set on fire, drowned, the list went on. She didn't want to watch. She didn't want to see the man who had given her such happiness go through such torture, but she never averted her eyes. Elaine wasn't sure if it was duty, obligation or the need to watch over a loved one, but she didn't turn away.

~.~.~

The heart can only take so much pain before the soul shatters.

Elaine didn't notice at first but the more she watched Ban suffer, the more her heart broke, and the more her heart broke, the more her physical body lost its colour. What she did notice was that slowly she became more and more numb and had less energy. It became harder and harder to power the crystals to look through and when she could activate them she could only do so in short bursts.

A far cry from the endless days she watched Ban in the beginning.

She knew her time of watching over Ban was coming to an end, but Elaine wanted to end it on her terms. So she rested. For an unknown length of time she rested, saving her strength.

Eventually she gathered up her energy and activated the crystal. Ban was there, chained as usual.

"I don't blame you for what happened. You couldn't possibly have known that demons have more than one heart, nor could you have known that one would attack the forest." Slowly she traced her hand over the image of Ban's face, memorizing his features. Wondering what it would have felt like under her skin, wishing she thought to do so while they had been together.

"I wish we could have run away together, snuck away when the demon attacked. In that one moment I was free of the forest. Free of guarding it. We could have traveled, seen the world together. When we were ready we could have planted the seed and settled down, made a home. Seeds can lay dormant for years, did you know that?

"But this is how things turned out. I fine with dying Ban, really I am, but I'm not ok with what you're doing to yourself. This isn't why I gave you the fountain of youth. This isn't what I wanted at all. I can't- I won't-..." Elaine had to stop for a moment. The words she so desperately wanted to say were there, but she couldn't bring herself to say them. Couldn't bring herself to sever the ties with the man who had ended her isolation and loneliness. The same man she had come to love so deeply he was now causing her an unspeakable amount of pain and suffering.

The vision wavered and vanished.

Elaine choked out a defeated laugh. It was the last time she would ever see him, and Ban was giving cooking tips to a pack of dogs eating him alive.

"You stupid, foolish boy."

* * *

 _There are many ways to corrupt a pure heart, but the easiest way to shatter it is love._

* * *

End

Please leave a review. Even if it's just a smiley face I'll still love it. :) Of course full reviews with words are even better.


	7. Prove It

Disclaimer: Seven Deadly Sins also known as Nanatsu no Taizai is not mine and I make no money off of this.

Characters: Meliodas, Liz

Summary: Liz wants Meliodas to prove his love for her, but Meliodas is _not_ impressed with how she wants him to do so.

Author's Notes: Everyone can thank a very drunk Lickitysplit for this story idea.

Also: Happy Birthday to coffin-of-eternal-darkness over on tumblr.

* * *

 **Prove It**

"I want you to prove it!" Liz declared suddenly, poking her finger hard against Meliodas' chest. Meliodas was grateful for the late hour, since that meant no one was around to witness him getting poked at like a child's newest discovery, in the middle of the street no less.

"Prove what?" he asked, pausing in his stride to look up at her. Liz's eyes were glassy and her face was flushed, she also swayed dangerously on her feet, despite his arm around her waist to help steady her, finishing the drunken look.

"You said that you love me." Liz stated simply, as if that explained everything.

"Yes I do," Meliodas agreed just as simply, not quite understanding where this was coming from.

She poked at his chest again, wiggling her finger teasingly. "I want you to prove that you love me."

Meliodas swallowed a sudden lump in his throat. It wasn't that he had a problem with proving his devotion, but her current mood set him on edge and his instincts were screaming at him to get away.

He ignored his instincts with practiced ease.

"So what do you want?" he asked after a moment of silence, hoping it wouldn't be anything weird or painful.

Liz's lips twitched, trying, and failing, to hide her amusement. "A piercing."

"A… piercing?"

"Yes. I want you to get a piercing."

"That's it?"

"That's it." She agreed with a smile and a nod.

Meliodas nodded, hiding his relief. "Well, that's not a problem. We can go and look for earrings tomorr-"

"Not there," Liz interrupted mid-word.

Meliodas paused, his earlier feeling of relief instantly vanishing with two words. "Not… where?" he asked slowly, beginning to get an inkling of where this was going.

"Not on your ear." Liz answered, her grin transforming from sweet to smug. "I want it somewhere else."

Cold trepidation crawled down his spine, causing Meliodas to shiver despite the warm night. "Where do you want it?

"Lower."

"My nose?"

"Lower."

"My lip?"

"Lower."

"My tongue?"

Liz shook her head slowly, smug grin turning wicked. "Lower."

Meliodas did not like the direction their conversation was going. Not a bit. "My… nipple?"

"Lower."

"Liz," Meliodas started with a warning note in his voice. "If it's my belly button then-"

"Lower." Liz interrupted once again.

"…What?"

"Lower."

Suddenly Meliodas knew…

"No!"

"Yes."

"No fucking way!"

"I want you to get your dick pierced," Liz stated triumphantly, staring down at him with a gleeful look in her eye, "and I'm going to watch."

Meliodas went completely still, mind racing as he tried to process what Liz, his sweet Elizabeth, was asking him to do. Unwittingly his mind drifted back to another time where she asked him for something equally as daunting.

"This is just as bad as the time you asked me to get circumcised!"

…

…

"...What?"

Meliodas buried his face in his hands. "It's true," he bemoaned, threading his fingers through his hair. "Your parents refused to let you be with me unless I got circumcised. So I did."

Liz cocked her head to the side, bemused by his response and wondering if he was more drunk than he let on. "But… you're not circumcised."

"Because of the stupid curse!" Meliodas exploded, starting to pace back and forth agitated. "I got the skin of my penis cut off, only for it to grow back several days later. Then I had to go through it all over again!"

Liz stumbled back as Meliodas whirled around and, in echo of her earlier actions, poked her firmly on the chest. "I tortured my penis once a week for twenty four years for you!"

There was a moment of silence as Liz tried to make any sense of what he was talking about. "I have no idea what you're talking about," she deadpanned.

"Of course you don't, and I both love and hate you for it." Meliodas muttered, defeated.

…

…

"...So," Liz started, breaking the awkward silence they had both fallen into. "Tomorrow we'll go and get your dick pierced." Her tone made it clear that negotiations were done and that the conversation was over, before turning and staggering off down the street.

Meliodas simply stood in the middle of the road, watching her stumble her way home, regretting all of his life's choices.

* * *

End

I regret nothing.


	8. Even If You Were To Die

Disclaimer: Seven Deadly Sins also known as Nanatsu no Taizai is not mine and I make no money off of this.

Summary: After Meliodas' death at the hands of the Ten Commandments, Elizabeth must now imagine a life without him.

* * *

"Even if you were to die, I'll keep the promise that I made to you."

Words easily said, but deeply regretted.

She didn't realize at the time what it meant, to say those words. To feel the emptiness of every moment of every day without him. Didn't realize just how deep the wound would go, or how it would linger and _ache_ in ways she never thought possible. She hadn't understood the look in his eyes back then. The haunted, tortured look that spoke of untold suffering simply from living. Of continuing on.

Now she understood.

What she wouldn't give just to be with him again. Just to have one more moment, one last chance to look into his eyes, to see his smile or simply enjoy his presence. To give him a hug that made her feel warm and safe or even simply to hold his hand, calloused but warm and gentle. How she wished she slept next to him without ropes, even just once.

Things she should have done during his life.

She never realized just how much she enjoyed the light and life reflected in his beautiful eyes or how the sun shone off his hair, making it look like spun gold. Didn't know how much she enjoyed seeing and hearing his easy, careless movement as he performed simple actions around the bar, or listened to his absent minded humming was he performed mindless tasks like washing dishes.

Events that would never happen again.

There was so much she should have said, like how just being around him made her feel safe, how he was an inspiration to her and motivated her to be the best she could be. Should have told him about how much she enjoyed journeying with him, working in the Boar Hat, and simply living life with him. Most of all she wanted to speak the words of love she had so recently discovered, that she had been so willing and content to keep to herself.

Diane was right: she should have told him.

Now it was too late.

What was death like? Was it peaceful? Was he happy? Being reunited with Liz and all those he lost during his life? Or did he miss those he left behind? Was he content with the way he died, going down after a long and difficult battle? Or did he regret not accomplishing his task of defeating the Ten Commandments and protecting Britannia?

She didn't know. She wondered if she would ever know.

"Even if you were to die, I'll keep the promise I've made to you."

How she cursed herself for uttering those foolish words.

All she wanted was to be by his side. All she felt was bitter disappointment every morning when she opened her eyes, knowing she would have to live another day without him.

* * *

End


End file.
